Is Coercive Control a responsibility in the workplace?
On 1st August 2018 the Fair Work Commission updated Modern Awards to include 5 days unpaid family and domestic violence leave.
The Domestic Violence leave is for employees facing family and domestic violence and needs to do something to deal with the impact of the violence that is impractical to do outside of their ordinary hours of work.
I had previously written another blog about Domestic and Family Violence and summarised a case which both highlight that it is in fact a business issue but I don’t think it is taken seriously. People think its rare but mostly I think people don’t understand it, don’t understand the signs but also don’t understand that it doesn’t have to be physical or be with partners that live together. Young couples, still living at home, are experiencing coercive control, they don’t even know it or understand it and some might even think its ok (for now at least before it gets worse and more serious). I don’t think it is that widely communicated sadly within this age group. Coercive control is a form of Domestic Violence, and it only gets worse – however, I do not pretend to be an expert on this topic at all.
I think everyone has an idea as to what domestic violence is, however, I think a lot of people still think it is physical and obvious when it’s not always. It can be very controlling and making you do or believe things you wouldn’t normally and stopping you from seeing people, isolating you from people particularly loved ones, making you believe things you wouldn’t normally, leaving the house or doing other activities important to you. It can also be emotional abuse, financial abuse, stalking or technology facilitated surveillance so it can show up in so many different ways which take freedom away from the victim and controls them.
Some signs might be; they seem afraid, they stop seeing friends or family, they are continually harassed with phone calls / texts / messages, they become anxious, depressed, quieter and maybe lost confidence, unexplained injuries just to name a few but coercive control particularly in younger ones is also harder to identify as they generally love the attention particularly in a new relationship and other people think its sweet but when you look at the big picture it starts to get concerning even when you don’t know everything that is going on, there is enough to see the red flags. Love bombing is, I think where it starts, being all charming at the start and then change (even without the partner knowing). It can be excessive compliments and gifts and pushing for a serious relationship early. Other red flags are; guilt tripping, disrespecting boundaries, gaslighting, escalating insults, making you dependent on them. Once it starts it only gets worse unless it is identified and accepted by the victim and stopped.
There are laws that came into effect in May this year against coercive control which I am sure help some situations, but it is important to identify it early hopefully before it gets to the point that the law may or may not come into effect.
So, in the workplace, I would be ensuring these issues are discussed at Manager / Supervisor and team level to assist in looking out for fellow colleagues and identifying it, maybe ask questions, plant seeds, provide information, provide understanding or even share experiences. Include it in annual training about workplace bullying, sexual harassment and discrimination or just discuss it at team meetings or the lunch room. No, it’s not the businesses responsibility, but it will affect your business through productivity, engagement, satisfaction, illnesses, absenteeism, turnover etc but also isn’t it a societal responsibility of everyone? Start by asking R U OK? Because it really could just save a life in more ways than one. R U OK? Day was celebrated on 11th September, but you can ask the question any day.
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Related articles: Employees and Family Domestic Violence; Domestic Violence is a business issue; Family and Domestic Violence Leave.
Leisa Messer BBus(HRM); GradDipIR; FCPHR
Managing Director | HR Strategist
leisa.messer@hrbd.com.au
07 3890 2066
hrbd.com.au